i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
They took my balls.
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
Randomize
