I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
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