...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
Randomize
