True true and the only thing that will burn more than the vodka we will consume is the shame in our loved one's eyes
And yet we make it a tradition to get inappropriately drunk at family functions. We amaze me.
At least it's not a funeral this time... I feel we're making improvements.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
She's better-looking with the mask on.
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