5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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