I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
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So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
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I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
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