Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
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