if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
Randomize