Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
Randomize
