He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
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