just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
your like the ambassador to my penis.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
So here I am, sexting at work.
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
Randomize