you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
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