my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
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