white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
Everyone says I win the strip club
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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