now i know why i became what i already was.
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
Randomize
