if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Randomize
