Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Randomize
