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Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
I need to stop being so honest when I'm drunk. I got proposed to by a stranger again last night. It's not my fault that I would be perfectly ok making sandwiches and giving blow jobs for the rest of my life.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
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