Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
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