I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
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