I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
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