When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Randomize