I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
Randomize
