u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
Santa Claus winked at me two tables over at the Chinese place tonight I was almost afraid he knew "getting laid" was my Christmas wish
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Randomize
