apparently the secret to your success is patron
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
Randomize
