I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
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