They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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