apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
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