I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Randomize
