She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
