I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Randomize
