I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
Randomize
