Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
So, someone in Olympia stole my credit card # last week and bought a platypus vibrator with it. That’s it.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
Randomize
