You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
Use "feeling words"
Yay
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
Randomize