Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
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