trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
Randomize
