If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize
