Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Randomize
