My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
This is your morning-after text courtesy of your very confused friend!! :) To discuss "what the hell were you trying to tell me last night," press 1. To laugh over your drunken antics, press 2. To pretend like none of it even happened (or to respond with concurrent confusion because you have no idea), press 3.
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
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