This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
What a dumb baby whore.
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Randomize
