you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Randomize
