.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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