Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
Randomize
