Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Randomize
