Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
Randomize