Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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