But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
Randomize
