Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
Still dying that you shit outside
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
Randomize
