I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My breasts were aching with rage.
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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