he wants to bone in the snuggie
My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
In case this wasn't clear when i said being his wingman was "hopeless", his date walked out on him when he poured a beer on his head trying to shotgun it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
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