i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.