The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
Randomize
